Gaijin Jump

By Craig Chapin. First published in December 2005.

This incident actually involved a high school senior who had been a student of mine when he was in seventh grade. He spotted me outdoors one day and expressed his desire to speak English “frequently.”

Knowing that he was facing college entrance examinations, I took it that he wanted to practice English frequently in preparation for the exams. So I proposed that we get together occasionally for that purpose.

My suggestion seemed to upset him, and he repeated that he wanted to speak English “frequently.” So I proposed a more regular arrangement. When this didn’t seem to satisfy him, I suggested more frequent sessions.

Contrary to the comic strip, he did not show up for our first appointment. But I did run into him again later, and at that point he haltingly explained that he didn’t want to practice English frequently; he simply wished that he could speak English fluently. He had been voicing a lament, not asking a favor.

For many Japanese people, English proficiency is a goal, but the prospect of actually speaking with a foreigner is unnerving. So although practice makes perfect, practice was not what this young man had on his mind.